Applying for the Veteran’s Aid and Attendance Pension: My Personal Experience

July 8, 2010

12:20 a.m. The clock was blurry as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes to answer the phone. “Hello”, I said.

A weak and frightened voice on the other end pleaded, “Melissa? Is Bryan there? I can’t get out of my chair. Could you or Bryan come over?”

I sighed as I handed the phone to my husband and heard him say, “I’ll be right over, Dad.”

When Bryan left, I pondered on my father-in-law, John, and his situation. John had just come out of the hospital after a serious illness and although the doctor had assured us he would be fine, we quickly learned that he was not able to care for himself. He lived alone in a small apartment and had in-home health care assistance through his Medicare plan. They came once a day to help him with a shower and to aid him with incontinence. Bryan and I came over three times a day to help him with changing his clothes and to make his meals. In addition, we helped him with his bills and took him to his frequent doctor appointments. Tonight was the first time he had called to ask for help in the middle of the night. We needed to do something different. We were both exhausted between working our jobs and caring for our four young children and constantly running out to take care of John’s needs. It was becoming more than we could handle. We realized we really needed to get him into assisted living.

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